Thursday, April 19, 2007

Finally...co-sleeping.

First of all, I hate this picture of me, but I always hate pictures of me sleeping. This is how we sleep, all snuggled up in our now way too small queen sized bed, and I wouldn't give it up for the world! I get a lot of flack for doing this but it seems to work the best for us.
Before Kaitlyn was born I had absolutely no intentions of having her sleep with us, but that first night in the hospital I just couldn't put her down, I was so in love with her! Once home I tried to put her in the bassinet but just wanted to hold her. Then we found out that she was jaundiced and were told to feed her every 2 hours, so I brought her into bed with us. I just loved holding her, spooned in tight close to my body. Dave would take turns with her sleeping on his chest and loved that too. At that time we planned (I say 'we' loosely because it really was me) to put her in her own bed by 3 months, then it was 6 months, then 9, then 12.....now by age 2. Every time I would put her in her own bed, turn on the baby monitor and go to bed I would lay there listening like crazy making sure I could hear her breathing. Then I would swear I could hear all kinds of other things (ghosts, the house and her toys coming alive) over the monitor and my imagination would go wild! She would make the slightest peep and I would run in to make sure she was ok. I slept less and she did too, so I brought her back to bed with us. I have friends that were at the time doing the cry out method according to the 'Happy sleep, Healthy child' book and were pushing that I give it a try. I caved and we tried it out. Huge mistake!!! After crying for over half an hour I could hardly bear it and she was not doing well, her breathing sounded tight. We went in held her, tried to comfort her and calm her down. She was so worked up she wouldn't even nurse. We tried everything and after 3 hours of wailing, she was hyperventilating and we headed for the hospital. Once there she calmed down and we had a chat with the doc's. They said there are different types of babies and their personalities vary like adults do. There is no one thing that will work for every baby and you have to feel it out and do what works best for you and baby. Ah, music to my ears. I then stared to do some reading up on baby sleep and found out that in most parts of the world babies sleep with their parents and that putting a baby in a crib in another room is a modern western European/American tradition. Babies who sleep with the parents (in the sames room even) were more rested and better natured than those who didn't. As for long term effects, kids turned out about the same, so it is just what works best at the time. We decided to test this theory. So when Ethan was born we planned to put him in the bassinet next to the bed. Turns out he was such a noisy sleeper none of us were getting any rest. We moved him to the baby room and turned on the monitor, and again I heard creepy noises and layed there staring at the ceiling all night listening. The next day I was exhausted so we had to find a solution. We headed to Toys R Us and bought a $%^* expensive video monitor. Aaaaah, peace, I could now watch and listen, it was perfect! We all were sleeping much better. Kaitlyn was still with us, and quite happy and Ethan seemed to really like it on his own. (so much for that theory) turns out this is what was best for us and was working. Then...Ethan started to teeth, waking hourly howling mad. After a few sleepless nights in the rocker, drifting off now and then and waking with a kink in my neck I brought him to bed with us. This is what works for us now. It is rather squishy, but we all sleep! Dave and I both look forward to having our bed back someday, but right now waking up to their cheery little faces is the best thing in the world!

1 comment:

Mary said...

Hey, that's great if it works for you. As for me, I cannot sleep with my kids in my room. I was determined to give it a try with both of my babies but I just could not sleep. Both of my kids are great sleepers now and I credit that with crying it out. They're both very happy, too. I'm not pushing crying it out, I agree that every baby is different. I'm just thankful it worked for my kids, since I cannot sleep with them and I desperately need my sleep or I'm a complete wreck and no good for my kids or my husband. I'm so glad sleeping with your kids works for you. You sound like a great mom! :)